- treasured memories

Wednesday, October 12, 2005

the old me..

i'm back for today. blogging. hmm.. i guess thats how the human's mind works. its really so funnie. when u've no one to trust to, one rather trust something that wont even give u advices. so funnie..

ok nbm. i tink i'm kinda losing touch of everything. everything seems to be falling apart. i've become more self-centered, not daring to socialize more with the opposite sex anymore, friendship, understanding, cheering ppl up, sensitiveness and all. somehow i seem to have lost everything. wonder wads left in me. in the past, i can juz so easily make a person smile or cheer up. with tt simple thing i do. yet now, no matter how much i try, even the person i take to be as my bro cant even smile, truthfully. cant even brighten up his day. wad am i now?

in the past, i'm able to socialize well with gurls, knowing more of them and they knowing me vice versa. bud think now, i dun even dare tok to most of them. i'm starting to lose touch. i once remembered my fren wanted to noe a gurl. frm the streets. i juz went up to her and said my fren wants to noe you. in the end, i gotto noe the gurl more den my fren do. now? hais. i dun even dare to walk up, ask for no or smth. wad is going on? scorpios are known to read ppl mind's easily. and i do. i know wad ppl are somehow thinking and do the right thing to cheer them up. bud now see again. i cant. hais. i'm keeping most of my troubles to myself and i dunno y. no one asked me. neither did anyone really cares till now.

yet somehow i put on some face, helping ppl hu are down. hoping to brighten up their day with everything. i used words lyk wads there to be sad of? u'll die one day, so y not make full use of now? bud in me, all i can is think, think and more thinking. how, who, when will that day come. when i can trust in a gurl. to accompany me on? i'm thinking too much again. wadeva. i'll continue searching. someday i'll reach out to you. someday u'll realise all along it was you. and i'll be searching inside of me too. to find that confidence, i once had. to brighten up everyone's day. to be able to sense ppls sadness and help them.. yet somehow.. i cant help myself though.

if only u can see me in this dark dark world of mine. someday we'll meet. someday we'll know each other.
busted.wasted.

darkside illusions 3:09 AM

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