Tuesday, February 28, 2006
outing and hating
ok. this time i finally wan say it out. =x after reading drew's blog, i believe i shld say it out. damm u hong kong gahkt! =x
ok. remember i said i dun lyk someone a few post back. its him. fine, i still can somehow tolerate u snatching things away, and being gay, bud pls, give some respect to girls/women/ladies or hu ever have the essence of a girl. look into the mirror yourself lyk wad drew says and reflect y u haven got a gf till now. u f***ing treat all girls lyk a eye candy. yes, one or two maybe. bud pls, dun point to every walking past girls and give the disgusted look. let me tell u, ugly i will think its ugly. pretty i will give comments, bud i wont degrade everyone till i will say it out that yucks. keep the words to urself la.
19 years walking on this surface of the year doesn't teach u anything of respect? coming to respect, even we the ppl younger than u needs respect. its by 1 year. and when i say no, dun beg me for it. its a utter disgrace. dun snatch wad aint belongs to you. i swear if u gonna do it again (without asking), i'm freaking going to swear at you.
READ THIS: you made not only 1 guy pissed, there's an army for you. so u better f***ing change your attitude towards us or smth's real bad happening. get your language rite too pls, i cant understand ur english. =.=
oh well, anyway, went out with my class c116 yest. met at orchard at 12. ended up ppl 1 den come. >< ahhhhh. i could have slept more! nbm. i always dunno y i early one when i noe sure will have ppl late. >< so after 1 hr's wait finally we set foot. went cine bought tickets to PINK PANTHER! on da way saw sean and guys. said hi. =))
finished, we ate at long john and took some photos. i was wondering wad is wrong with me having self obsession yesterday. so after lunch, walked arnd and went for the show. its damm funnie la can! lols! after movie, took bus to esplanade, take pics and walk arnd. ok la. crappy pics. i took some videos. xD den nite we went swensens eat. saw kiwi and his class there. waved to him. yandao kia sia. lols! anyway, there's this lady i tink arnd my age which caught my eye. y? cos her eyes are damm nice. lols! oh well~~ moving on, went home after that. was kinda nice la the day, juz some tiredness and sianess. =x woops!
argh. i nid to learn ow to make video stuffs. i juz d/led 3 new softwares juz to do it. so now, my comp is so IT. with stuffs lyk, fireworks, photoshop, dreaweaver, freehand, flash, audiocity, mediaJoin, audio converter, movie converter, virtual dub and stuffs. so many programs. look lyk i nid to improve b4 school start. lols! nid brush up my multimedia skills. =)) till den, bye!
darkside illusions 12:39 PM
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Monday, February 27, 2006
down symdrome
omg omg! my fren juz gave me a link! this girl is so cute! lols. frm ngee ann sec one. hahas. is lyk, the things she does is cute! hahahas. anyway, *ahem* hahas. was kinda out of mood today. dunno y. no feeling sia. ><
sat went to the asian beat grand finals at taka with nic, chee keen and virus. wasnt in the mood to go, bud still went after they 'pshchoed' me. oh well. was kinda ok. the drummers were damm freaking ultra powerfully superb! sg band was kinda turn off with those kinda rock type again. same few genre. compared to japan, thailand and indonesia. kinda still a long way to go. yeah..
i wonder myself, 17+ years liaos. which path did i take was correct. i tot for so long. am i really wad i shld be? now? or maybe i would be another guy if i took another path. the things i'm doing now is caused by me. so i guess in the end, i'm the one hu is the creator of my life. the one hu decides on my destiny bud not fate.
yeah. was walking back to ps frm taka. on the way saw xiao gong zhu! hahas! so qiao! i was surprised to see her den. she said she went movie and stuff with her friends later on on msn. oh well. kinda quite some time since i last saw her.
today, went for drums lesson. richard aint here, so i guess that guy is anthony replaced him. he let us jam a song called Child's Anthem. ITS SIMPLY SUPERB! gosh. how i wish i could let u all hear. hahas! the song is so wonderful that i played a different beat from the score given. lols! so nice! oh well. same old stuffs. got into a down symdrome later on when i saw some girls. =.= they reminded me of smth in their conversation. suddenly everything juz flooded back into me. aint really in da mood later on and i got tired. oh well. ~~
sometimes i wish i knew myself better. at least i noe wad to do. y am i rejecting. y? y? y? wad is the factor behind it? it lies as a mysetery still.... nites all..
darkside illusions 2:33 AM
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Saturday, February 25, 2006
holidays!
alright mans! holidays have finally come! a long holiday i've been waiting for! this means 1 year have passed already. >< gosh. seems to me i juz got into tp last month or smth. ><
oh well, exams had ended and i'm broke for the month too. argh. curses. anyway, i'm relaxing for now. hahas. woots! i love holidays! its been a tough term. real tough.
i cant wait!
- intsc camp
- foc/fow camp
- centis outing
- class outing
- i guides chalet
- should i go for dnd?
lols! bad sadly no dates for me yet. i wan to go out! i dowan stuck in arcade doing the things liao! someone jio me out can!!!!!!! hahas! anyway, dad finally bought me dvd r. i can burn off my bleach and stuff. D drive left with a pathetic 300mb. =.= oh well! camp's coming and we yet to be notified. i hope everything goes well. tatax!
dm sp: 1007.67
gf sp: 960.xx
woots. both 1k! here i come. hahas!
darkside illusions 2:27 AM
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Tuesday, February 21, 2006
exams..
ok. wouldn't be blogging till thurs due to exams. bud tag will still be on. =)) anyway, i passed by this interesting article. want to voice my view out. bold is the writer emphasise one. the one in read is i agree. =x its long. so if ya not interested. den you can tag me straight. xD
-start-
Boy and girl meet. They realize they live and work near one another. They begin hanging out -very casually- often calling each other with a "Hey! I'm in the area, want to hang out?"
A few weeks pass with them dropping by each other's place and they realize they enjoy spending time together and there is attraction.
Sounds like a great start, right?
If you're a guy, sure! But apparently, if you're female, this is something that should make you mad!
What am I talking about? Wooing the girl.
The guy and girl, first casual friends, realized they're attracted to each other. Perhaps they even start to kiss and share happy sentiments. The girl then announces, "Wait! I'm mad at you, you didn't even woo me!"
The girl clarifies that she is mad that there were no romantic dinners, no sweet gestures such as flowers, no planning for when they would see each other next. Hence, she cannot allow herself to like the guy because he did not "woo" her.
If attraction develops through get-togethers, is there something invalid about it?
Does a guy have to "woo" a girl through the traditional nonsense such as dinner and movies in order for the girl to be comfortable enough to like him? Why doesn't just hanging out count as wooing? I think that might actually be a better way of figuring out that you're attracted to someone, through relaxed casual interaction rather than in the confines of a "formal" date.
Even more nonsensical is for a girl to backtrack on their feelings because they feel that they weren't wooed enough. It's like saying, "We both like each other. But too bad, I need to feel like you put more effort into winning me over". So even though the girl likes the guy, she will refrain from allowing herself to enjoy the sensation of attraction. I would love a girl to explain to me how this is logical.
What's the proper thing to do? Sure it's great for the guy to be romantic, and he will be, but does it make sense to penalize him for not wooing the girl from the beginning?
It's much better if attraction develops while hanging out in casual get-togethers. It's a sign that the attraction is a natural chemistry between the two. Guys easily appreciate the good things that come their way. So when we feet attracted to someone, it's great! We don't think about how the attraction came to be or what actions were take, we just enjoy the sentiment. It's simple - girl and boy like each other, why make it be so complicated?
- end -
actually. i somehow agree with him on some points la. y muz wooing be part of the 'criteria' for choosing someone? as in yes. if one party wants to make the other one attract to them. bud if both share the same attraction, y makes things so long-winded? as in. hangouts, when u feel comfortable, its more den enuff aint it?
instead, i tink the 'wooing' stuffs are somehow done when the 2 parties are together. this is where the romantic stuffs and dinners starts coming in. because of the natural chemistry. isnt that so? y base on a guys 'wooing' skills and decide when to accept him when in your heart is ming ming lyk him? is 'wooing' really that important now?
- this only applies to both parties lyk each other. dun misunderstood -
oh well. sometimes girls are weird. so are guys. everyone is. i dunno y. oh well. guess i'm going weird too. how i wish the girl i lyk oso lyk me back. the romantic stuffs can take place when we are together. naturally. bud this thing seldom seems to come. oh well. may god bless. gotta study now! maths! here i come! i feel hungry. =.= nites guys!
darkside illusions 1:15 AM
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Saturday, February 18, 2006
hmmm..
ok. life is going on as usual for me now. thanks to kiwi and miss yuting! ^^ advices really works well for scorpio i guess. oh ya. not forgetting nic bro! hahas. i dunno y bud i take advices quite into an importance to my life. the could change me for the easiest scenario.
yeah. finally got my lazy butt to practive some OOPG. ok. not my butt lahs. is juz an expression. hahas. went down to dbg abt 5 to join the peeps for some 'actions' after i had enuff. hahas. let my hair down as i can say. today was kinda well. sang songs, jammed hard. oh well. i gess is cos of the stress and the troubles i seem to experience over the past week. =.=
oh well, troubles seems to drift away since i pulled away from the main road. i guess i'll take her advice by studying first. ^^ thats wad i wan to do now! argh! concentrate lex! y are u tokin to ur bloggie! @.@
bud after exams is war time! hahas. anyway, yest hanged out till quite late with the guys. talked abt everything and abt anything under the sun. bud poor shouji doesn't understand chinese so most of the time he seems bored. hahas. yeah abt all i guess.
ps: to mr.virusz, if i can do it. so can u. my past experience in love is really worse den u sia. one day tell u. if i can overcome it, try ur best, you can too. and not everyone is out to kill you. ppl may joke with you bud when it comes to serious stuffs, there are friends who stay by you. so cheer up dude! i still wan see ur kazen na inochi to pass on 'extreme' mode. =)) kays?
no one is perfect. the only time you are perfect, is in someone's eyes. so never doubt you are perfect. somewhere, somehow, you may be perfect in someone's eyes..
- lex
darkside illusions 1:28 PM
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Thursday, February 16, 2006
Kurenai - X Japan
and i guess life getting tough again. had some time for a new skin. not the best. bud i believe can be improved. my web skills still aint that good compared to nic's. T.T
yeah. got my butt of the drum chair to my study chair to do some oOPG. hope i can do well for the exams thats all. hais. dowan to repeat my sub. anyway, yeah. at home the whole day. studying and doing this skin at nite. she came online and chatted for some times. really juz enjoy talking to her. make me feel really at ease. =)) how i wish these times never end. though sometimes the words may not be the ones i want to hear, its still great having you as my chatting mate. =))
maybe i shld be satisfied. i want to noe wad you're thinking. i really want. bud somehow my words juz wont blurt out. past relationship really put me to the test and i admit some really left deep memories in me which i wont forget. for life. they're sweet. really. even now. bud all i ask for is a nice and proper girl to be with.. bud someone that girl never seems to come to me.
oh well. i noe i'm somewhat very very very far away from your expectations. i may not be the world in you eyes. but to me, you're everything more than the world. oh well. guess thats sums up all. oh ya. x japan is getting more and more soothing to my ears nowadays. some are emo yet nice. KURENAI! =x ok. tt was random and out of point me. i failed valentine's this year bud i hope by my bday, i can have you by my side, lyk wad you are now. lyk i am to you now.
*/
fell in love with just you
nothing else
i want to be with you
the road may be long and windy
but i believe
i'll be the 2nd guy who will make you move..
j(lala // aint want say name out in case. =x) i'm serious
really.
*/
<3
darkside illusions 2:57 AM
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Wednesday, February 15, 2006
valentines
alright. so valentines juz gone lyk tt? hahas! so fast 24 hrs. hmm. oh well. finally got some chilling out period on my own. went bugis arnd 3 - 6+ oh well. as usual. lotsa eye candies to see at bugis. =x *gulps* and also lotsa couples carrying flowers. its the chill out day afterall. so i asked myself.. 18 years and wad have i done? which love for me works out? gosh! and so i tried finding the answer to this question. walked arnd bugis. seeing couples having short kisses here and there. even ah peh and ah ma held hands and blocked my way. =.=
oh well. thats valentines again. msg her. bud reply aint that good. sot. =x its ok. for me this turned normal already. nth much of a big deal. i've learned to look things at a new perspective. *looking at kiwi's nick. =x*
so got my hands on a few games of drums at the arcade or smth. wasnt really at the best form nowadays. since i got my 1k skill points, i feel i going down again. bud simple songs the p rate can go crazy to an extend of 97%? =x oh well.
so nth much. went dbg. and there's this girl who stared at me when she walked past with her frenz. i pretend not to see. bud when i turn over. she still looked at me. bah~ and den gave me a wink and went missing in the crowd. i was lyk wth was that. argh. do i look lyk a duck or smth? wan noe my number come ask me la! =x lols! oh well forget that. reached dbg, did not touch any drums or guitar nemore at zone x. went guilty gear xx instead. fun. xD yeah. saw couples here and there. abt all for my vday... hope some years down the road, my v day aint this saddening as this year's one.
maybe i shld look on the bright side lyk the i not stupid 2. someone ask me for a relationship. yet i stumbled. dinda noe wad to do. its hard to forget you. bud everyone told me to move on. you did not give me a direct answer on how you feel. bud i noe ya the one. i dowan to let you go. T.T everyone asked me to move on. shld i? if ever ya reading this which is 0.01%, tell me how u feel. not as a backup plan bud at least i can put my heart to somewhere i feel warm.. <3
*/
you may not noe.
sometimes little things can juz kill my heart off.
yet i believe in believing.
if today i cant wait for you
there's always another day.
v day went off without seeing you
its bad enuff
bud i juz want you to noe
i've fallen for you
not for you
bud for wad you are
dedicated to - *can keep as secret? =x to a j(lalala). =x
*/
darkside illusions 1:39 PM
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Sunday, February 12, 2006
wish
i really want you for valentine's. is that too much to ask? will you ever noe how much u mean to me? hais. all this are all in da dreams. nth gone rite for me this yr yet. tts all for today. not in best of mood. nites all. guess if u said yes, that can at least cheer me up. T.T
darkside illusions 3:24 AM
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Saturday, February 11, 2006
i hate OOPG!
f***ing hell sia. i was accused of plagiarising my frenz project when i stayed up all nite to chiong. wth is that! that tcher i really bth sia. juz i had lower results and did not participate much in class u suspect me of that? damm sia! this yr is really kinda suay! gosh! wad have i done to deserve all these? everything is not going right! argh! someone pls help me! i really cannot tahan all this nonsense le! ><
juz a want you. for valentines day. thats enuff for me. =((
darkside illusions 1:45 PM
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Friday, February 10, 2006
=))
yeah. and so i'll blog today. everyone seems to be blogging lesser and lesser these few days. oh well. anyway. and so... vday is approaching real soon and i've yet to have a confirm date. >< oh well. suay i guess. ppl all say i will have a date. oh well. i guess so. its juz me. =))
anyway, life has been such a bore again. nth changed since the past seriously. i'm still the old me. worse in words. ah beng la, slacker la, loser la, cmi la, eto la, all were thrown at me. hmm. i wonder y. lols. my mama say i this yr offend tai sui (a diety) and ask me to tolerate as much as i can. if not i have big trouble. and i realise yeah. i need. so these few days i've tolerate as much as i can. putting that i dun mind face. oh well. i hope this takes into me. kinda lyk the way some ppl think until if their not guilty, den will believe in themselves. i guess i lack in that ability.
oh yeah. presentation for my IDES was a success! yays to me! i prayed there that hope my website wont die on me when i present, and i guess lady luck was smiling on me tt day. =)) bud bros were kinda unlucky. dun think too much k? smiles bro.
hmm. love is in the air already. i'll say wad i see. =)) i was walking to the arcade today. den there was this couple. i guess is new one. the girl wanted to hold the guys hand. she prod her hand to his hand bud i guess the guy did not sense it. den thinking that she failed, she pulled her hand back. now, the contridicting part is... the guy oso wanted to hold her hand! and he prod her hand. yet same reaction, no feeling. so they continued walking.. and i was juz behind. den together suddenly, they said, can i hold ur hand. =.= lols! so funnie. i laughed out a little and they looked back and gave me a smile. i smiled back and said jia you. =x dey smiled again and hold hands and walked away already. awww. sweet rite. hahas. oh well... guess i want my love story to be as sweet as this... hee..
yahs. so back to the first thing. i guess most prob is lonely valentines in the arcade trying to get 1020 sp. hee. possiblity of me getting a successful date is only 10% now. hu will fail o levels ne? lols! nbm bahs. guess this yr is again not my year for love to appear. i'll wait. =))
and before i go, good luck to everyone taking back their o levels results later. =)) wan an le..
darkside illusions 1:31 AM
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Saturday, February 04, 2006
-.-
nth much to blog. juz too moodless to say anything. someone get my mood back pls. i dunno y suddenly i feel this way. life sucks for now. ><
any one single for valentine's day? can jio me out. =p i dowan lonely valentine's tts all. fan zhen bu ke neng you will ask me out one. so ya. any takers? xD oh well, i promise i wont be moodless on that day. wahahas!
argh. shant say anymore. off to bed. nite peeps.
伤心的眼泪你永远都不会看得到。。
等着等着。。
几十你才会发觉我的存在？
几十你才会忘掉你的过去呢？
等到那天时，
我是否有机会和你在一起？
但是那天会不会到来现？
几十我才会在
你心里有个角落？
几十才会让你知道其实爱的人是你？
情人节没机会跟你在一起，
但我心里一直想要知道，
你心里想的时什么。
如果只有朋友的可能性，
我将会发着呆，
让后微微笑，接着紧紧闭上眼，
最后会放弃。但如果我还有一滴的希望，
希望你会跟我说。我会尽我权力，
直到你和我同心。。
darkside illusions 3:47 AM
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Wednesday, February 01, 2006
day 3 of cny..
oh well. day 3 of cny passed by with me staying at home doing my projects. how pathetic can that get? bud i wasted 2 hrs thinking on wad you said. hmm. and i decided that even so, maybe this time i want to prove that i can. =))
oh well. nth much for the records. just hope FOC/FOW comes soon. i wan to let my hair down. really. stressed up too much. dunno y, i hope for year 2 to come. hais. i just dunno y. made real lotsa friends in TP when joining so many events. really, there are so many more i want to meet. yet somehow its hard though. eye candy they say.
looking back, when i stepped into TP the first day. i only noe 3 peeps. knnth, chee keen and nic. oh well. and now look. i have more dan a thousand new friends in tp. bud the most rewarding was noeing you i guess.
hais. v day's really coming lyk in 2 weeks. since last nite, i really dunno wad i shld do. y am i so stupid ah. cant control stuffs and everything. i've already told myself not to be rash into jumping into things. and now i've done it again. making myself think abt sucha things again. argh. i'm juz hopeless in this aspect. schoolwork aint right for me also. IT course sure is tough. nth's going right this yr. dog year seems to be kinda bad.
bud i'm kinda happy for my cousins. they were once bad guys. real bad. drugs and stuffs. visitors of prison. bud now look at them now. so happy for them. turned good, kind and friendly le. really can look up to them as life-changer. one even turned to be a good daddy with a cute cute child. which makes me an uncle. so happy for them. his image changed and everything. i'll get the pic up here. =))
guess, valentine's is still lonely this year. unless you dun mind going out oso. which is 20% of the chance of 100000%. >< and oh ya. thanks maybelin for talking to me and stuffs. i feel that we can trust each other sia. xD maybe thats smth good for this dog year. someone still needs to fill in that spot of zhi ji peng you. =))
sis and me on cny day
there. my cute little nephew. SO CUTE CAN!
my yandao cousin hu become daddy le!
darkside illusions 3:49 AM
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